It was a "Man Challenge Monday" this morning on the "Todd & Andy Show" and today we were charged with coming up with the ultimate male-oriented Thanksgiving.

Or, MANksgiving, if you will ...

Andy's dream holiday:

  • First, no vegetables … real men should eat food that’s hard to catch, vegetables are easy to catch.
  • Second, as a result of rule No. 1, we all go into a pen and catch and kill live turkeys with our bare hands.
  • Third, we all have turkey and Coke ... Wild Turkey and Cokes while watching women wrestle in mashed potatoes … I’ll bring the stuffing, ladies.
  • Fourth, I offer my wife a turkey neck … at least it looks like a turkey neck.
  • Finally, I fall asleep on the sofa with my pants undone.

And Todd's:

  • NO guests! No company = no coats on the bed = I might get some lovin'!
  • NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell proclaims a "Lion-Free Zone" on Thanksgiving so we won't have to watch that godawful team play year in and year out.
  • Worldwide shortage of cranberries. 'Nuff said.
  • Sleep in until kickoff of first football game. Arise and eat an entire can of black olives and an entire summer sausage for "breakfast."  Take first nap. Wake up whenevs.  Drink 64-ounce Irish coffee. Ask the wife for the umpteenth time, "How long till the bird's done?"
  • Hate on the Dallas Cowboys for the next three hours
  • Eat so many stuffed celery sticks, crackers and cheese and other appetizers -- along with numerous libations -- that my eyes get bigger than my stomach. Sit down to dinner around 5:30-ish and proceed to push away a half-eaten plate. Take another nap. Wake back up just in time to see that -- oh, shoot! -- all of the dirty dishes are now in the washer! Make a turkey sandwich. Go into a tryptophan-induced coma.  Wake up at 5 a.m. on Black Friday and realize that I do not have to go into work. Give alarm clock "the bird." Go back to sleep.

Giving thanks for great listeners all year round, Happy Thanksgiving to you from all of us here at 94.5 KATS!

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