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Five Reasons Not To Go Out On Your Birthday

Today, April 12th, is my birthday. It’s shared with David Letterman, Shannen Doherty, Claire Danes and many others, I’m sure. I appreciate the ‘Happy Birthdays’ but I don’t celebrate it much. I’m kind of a homebody so I chill at home with the kids. Sure, we’ll get a cake because that’s what’s supposed to happen on your birthday from a kid’s point of view, but I refuse to go out. Here are my top five reasons why I never go out on my birthday.

It’s Expensive
Sure, it’s my birthday and there are plenty of places that offer a free meal or free drink, but the act of leaving the house, I’m bound to spend money and, because I have the birthday excuse, I may end up spending more than I wanted to.

I Have Kids
Birthday’s can be for anyone, but I still think they’re really for kids. I wouldn’t be much of a role model if I told my kids, “well, it’s my birthday so you’re staying at home to be bored while Daddy has fun without you.” I don’t think there’s anything wrong with stepping out for a drink maybe after the kids are in bed, but me, I’d rather spend it with him.

I Don’t Want to Embarrass Anyone
Specifically, I don’t want any restaurant employee to come out and pretend like they’re having a blast clapping and singing a royalty-free birthday song. That’s one of the most degrading things anyone can do at any employment. If the server casually walked up to the table and said, “I noticed it was your birthday, would you like some compliment ice cream?” I’d most likely take them up on the offer. If the entire kitchen staff comes out just to clap for me, it’s not worth it. I’ll save them the trouble and stay home.

Previous Experience

Of course there was a time when I would go out on my birthday before I was married or had kids and those days didn’t end well. Hungover, my friends would be hungover as well. Long gone are those days. I look back with fondness and stories, but I would never want to revisit those days.

It’s My Birthday, That’s Why!
Like I need an excuse. A birthday can be celebrated in any way. Me? I just want to hang out like any typical day. Not that it’s not special, but I don’t feel the need to make this one specific day more important than anything going on.

What kind of birthday traditions do you have?

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