Mask Mandate Is Back, So Are The Wacky Masks!
Well, one good thing with the Mask Mandate back in effect, is all the money, time, and effort I put into making, finding and buying masks, is now useful again! I know, this isn't something that should be celebrated, but I try find a silver lining in every dark cloud, even if the dark cloud is currently smoke from nearby fires! Either way, we have to wear masks again, which gives me the perfect excuse to go back into public wearing my Bane (Batman: The Dark Knight Rises) mask out in public (again)! That's not even the weirdest one in my bank robbing/COVID preventing arsenal!
1 - Black Spider-Man Mask: Released as a special offer with Spider-Man 3 on DVD, this mask covers the mouth and nose. Is easy to breathe in, and they slay black is very slimming. The bad part about this mask, it was originally meant for a child, so it was very tight, and it's 13 years old, so kind of smells from being in storage.
2 - Ninja Mask: Some would say it's Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat, but in actuality, it's just a dollar store hard piece of plastic that barley fits. It does breath very well, covers the nose & mouth, but I'm pretty sure I will be challenged to fight someone. On the flip side it does bring out my beautiful eyes!
3 - Armored Batman: This mask is badass! Voice changing, light up eyes, soft, fits well. Does not cover mouth or nose, but honestly if you're this close to someone wearing a Batman mask, you probably have more things to worry about than COVID-19.
4 - The Red Hood: This might be the nicest one. Covers the mouth and nose, easy to see out of and breathe. Very comfortable. Only problem I really have with this one is after you wear it a long time, you feel more goth.
5 - KISS Bandanna: It's a bandanna, should protect others against my mouth and nose droplets. If you tie it too tight, you'll get a line across your face, but other wise it's very stylish. Only bad thing with this is, wearing it for long periods of time may attract fans of Peter Criss.
6 - Iron Man: Might just be another perfect mask. It fits nicely, covers the mouth & nose. Unlike the Batman one, this does not change your voice, but the yellow part does lift up for easy drinkin', in true Tony Stark style.
7 - The Joker: From The Dark Knight, this mask is about 12 years old. Has not held up well in storage. The hair use to be green, but the ink has faded. It does cover the mouth and nose well, but very hard to breathe in. Plus the way the mask sits, your bottom lip always looks like you're tongue.
8 - Rey Mysterio - Damn I look good in yellow. This mask won't stop nose nuggets or mouth molecules from escaping, but it might cause people a little hesitation about getting into the ring with me. Especially when I fly (fall) off the top rope!
9 - General Grievous: Covers mouth? Check! Covers nose? Check! Offer's eye protection? Check! Changes your voice? Originally yes, but it broke. Comes with 4 lightsabers? Sadly no. Intimidating so people stay 6 feet away? Check & Check! Thank you Star Wars.
10 - The Grey Alien: Creepy as hell but does cover the mouth and nose, plus the whole hood offers sun protection, plus the eyes are tinted for added eye safety. The only downsides to this mask are that it's hot as hell, and you may need to probe someone.
11 - The KATS Mask: Fashionable! Stylish! & it shows which station you rock out too! It's extremely comfortable, but if you have a beard, it might be trying to make an escape! Be on the look out for this new addition to the KATS Swag!
12 - Wonder Woman Bandanna: I'm a comic nerd, and my wife is an enabler! She bought me this one! It's colorful, it's comfy, easy to put on! The only bad thing, is when I go full Linda Carter and spin around in a circle, I run the risk of it flying off.
13 - The Lay's Chips Bag: Not super practical, but it already has a face at the top of the bag, and if you don't clean it properly before wearing, you'll smell BBQ (in this case) the whole time you're wearing it!
14 - Spaceballs - The Face Mask: I love this one, but you have to know your Spaceballs movie history. In a nutshell, the movie was forbidden from selling merchandise. Lucasfilm & THX helped with all the special effect in exchange for Mel Brooks not selling anything. That is why it's such a huge joke in the movie. Pitching everything from Spaceballs: The Coloring Book, Spaceballs: The Bed Sheets, Spaceballs: THE FLAMETHROWER! When I saw this mask for sale, I bought it immediately! My only con with it, is because the writing is too big, not many people will fully make it out and truly appreciate it.
15 - Black Panther: With the passing of Chadwick Boseman, I felt I should let this puppy shine! Wakanda Forever & R.I.P. Mr. Boseman!
16 - The "Sorry Bro, I left my mask in the car!" T-shirt Mask: I kid you not, last week, with in 5 minutes, inside my local quick mart, as I was walking in, the guy behind me came in without his mask, immediately realized his error, pulled his t-shirt over his nose and said "Oh, I'm sorry bro, I left my mask in the car!". I just smiled (under my mask). I bought my stuff, and left. As I was leaving, the same EXACT scenario happened again with a different guy just walking in.
17 - BANE: From The Dark Knight Returns movie! I bought this mask right at the beginning of the pandemic... from China. Might not have been the smartest decision, but I am still happy with it over a year later!
18 - Pink Camo: I must say, for the mask my wife wears often, it's comfortable and it smells nice. Plus the color matches my eye (pink eye joke)! Only sad part, is with it being camouflage, I'm afraid I'll be kicked out of a store for someone not seeing that I am in fact, wearing a mask!
19 - Robot Warrior: When I found and paid a dollar for this kids mask, I must say, it reminded me of the Robots from Mortal Kombat... maybe if the Reptile (green) ninja got turned into a cyber assassin. It's light, breathes easy, and possibly intimidating!
20 - "This is fine": The perfect mask for this time frame does exists, and it's super comfy to wear! This is one of my favorites, and fits all the crap we're going through right now!
21 - Master Chief/Halo Helmet: Yes I own a Halo helmet! Yes I have worn it in public! Yes it meets the standards for the epidemic AND the Flood!
22 - Happy/Sad Mask: Depending on my mood, this mask can convey to the world what I'm feeling. Plus, it's kind of nice to see smiles again, even if it's just a sharpie smile!
23- Seattle Kraken: First game of the newest NHL Hockey team is coming up (mid October)! Showin' my support, pride, and safety with probably my favorite mask!!!
It's nice to know, with no end in sight for the pandemic, that these will all keep coming in handy. & if by chance, I wear these out... I'll just find some more masks! Cheers!