During downtime in the daily doldrums, the mind wanders to a future-tripping window when we all can get together, get down, get back up again and rock our collective asses off.

The COVID-19 lineup would consist of talent related only to literally how dangerous the artist or band sounds. My wheels got turning and before you know it, here's a few ideas about the ultimate Coronapalooza Comeback Concert Blowout Lineup, the order would have to be determined.

Loudermilk would start, got to give props to local, legendary slingers. Besides, what if the milk goes sour? Louder, sour, milk. Not dangerous, buy yukky.





Nine Inch Nails


T. Rex (Dinosaur Jr. at stage left)

10,000 Maniacs

Wham! (name only, people)

The Killers

Bad Wolves

B-52's (think of the payload!)

Fine Young Cannibals

The Rolling Stones (like, How many? How big? Downhill? Could be scary)


The Dead Kennedys

They Might Be Giants (because you just don't know...)

Animals (all of them?)

Five Finger Death Punch

Jimmy Eat World

Meat Loaf

Chicago (harsh. true, but harsh)

Butthole Surfers (seems intimidating to me)

Franz Ferdinand (go to a show, trigger a World War?)

Dire Straits

Asia (think about it)

A-ha (element of surprise?)

Earth Wind and Fire

The Sex Pistols (not sure I'd want to stand toe-to-toe, so to speak, with Johnny Rotten)

Foo Fighters

The Police (s**t just got real for some)

The Alan Parsons Project (because it could be anything. Could be a book. Could be a spice rack. Could be some sort of doomsday machine that I'm not willing to roll the dice on.)

And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead  (the absolute BEST Coronapalooza name EVER.)

See you at the show!

Least scary honorable mention: Korn; Cake; Blind Melon; Limp Bizkit

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