AI Predicts Yakima Valley's Weirdest July 4 Traditions

If you asked AI how the Yakima Valley would celebrate Independence Day, you’d get the generic answers. Barbecue, fireworks, pool fun. And, it would pretty much nail it. But if you press it a little harder, and ask what it really thinks about central Washington and how we celebrate the big day of booms, you can get some pretty wild and weird answers.

How AI Thinks We Celebrate The 4th Of July In The Yakima Valley

Let’s be clear, I’m not a big fan of AI. Besides the automatic Google search and AI response, I don’t find myself using ChatGPT, Claude, or Baird for information.

evil robot thinking in front of an American Flag — Robot Evil Celebrate - 1

I DO, however, have used them (mainly ChatGPT) for idea starters, kind of the way I used to practice my stand-up comedy time when I was doing Improv. It is nowhere near as great as my fellow improvisers in Manic Thunder, but it did make me crack a smile with this request.

“What weird ways do you think residents in Yakima, Washington celebrate Independence Day?”

Here are my 5 favorite responses… some I may actually try. In bold will be its suggestion, and what will follow will be my interpretation.

AI's Thoughs On Yakima's 4th Of July Celebrations, With Some Help

Sprinkler Olympics: As the weather heats up (or in preparation for falling fireworks), people turn on their sprinklers. Kids start playing, drunk adults start playing. Everyone is having fun, splashing, falling down, and getting injured. Ambulance comes, they don’t have fun dealing with drunk partiers.

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Hotdog Eating Contest: Not all that creative, so I'd spruce it up by making it a CORNDOG eating contest... sticks and all! I mean, if the paramedics are going to be there anyway, might as well make it worth their wild!

Man Vs Wind, The Great Grill Off: Spending hours getting the charcoal just right only for the wind (which has been crazy lately) to ruin it. Or if you’re like me 2 weeks ago, barbecuing with my propane grill, open up the lid right when a strong gust of wind hits and almost knocks the grill over. That sucked!

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‘Murica Tailgate Party: Lynyrd Skynyrd blasting out of the big ass stereo in the back of every truck bed, along with coolers, brews, dogs, and anything that can fit on a grill is on the grill. Red White & Blue clothing everywhere, complete with a Kid Rock look-alike parade! ‘Murica!

Fireworks or Orchard Cannon: Always a fun guessing game when you live out in the West Valley or the Tieton/Naches areas. More in the city, you could play Fireworks or Gunshots. (I’m joking… kind of).

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